Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Really don't have the time
I really don't have the time to be writing this blog but i need another outlet besides smoking weed. I am developing a bad habit that lately i have found hard to break but I believe if i keep myself busy and stress free a the same time I can do it. But the reality is a addict will alway be a addict so realisticaly maybe I can smoke just occasionally not daily like i've been doing for the past year. Truthfully my motavion is this guy that I have been seeing for about two months now. Obviously I really like him but does he feel the same about me? Well let me tell you we hve been having awesome sex lately and over the weekend sparks flew ....we just had like a real fucking connection. I spent the nite at his house work up to go to work about 2 hours later i get a text saying "why did you leave so soon i wanted to spend more time with you" Sweet huh?Well look on fb later that nite status is ...I really want to see my boo again ...by this time this guy has got me weak in the knees ... to top it off he sends me a text saying good nite blah blah blah.Well ! Now I havent heard from him in two days ...maybe im over reacting because he does go to skool so maybe hes busy with that ?IDK but one thing i failed to mention was that this nigga got a baby mama now really i dont want to be involved in that shit and he says he hates her guts but be for real! let me know whats really up .... I dont wanna fall for this guy and get my feelings hurt thats not fun but at the same time i keep telling myself young love is the greatest feeling in the world and not alot of people get to experience that ...so i should enjoy it while i can even if it does involve me getting my feelings hurt-->Carpe Diem Live for the moment ....Float on that fucking cloud until it gets shot down like always ?IDK should I try and make it work and stop questioning or should i follow human nature and question because I do have to look into the future .....ugh ...fuck feeling fuck being a female and always being put in this position ....I want that nigga so bad but if i cant have him for myself then so be it!